News Fash
At 14:00 hours, Friday the 16th, the newest Super-villain was introduced to the world. Reports have surfaced that Matthew Cannon defended his thesis, for the "Collsional Formation of Heavy Rydberg Ion-Pair States". Matthew was reported as a mild mannered Graduate Student, but new information regarding the well being of his psyche is being called into question. Along with being a student for over 25years, his 3 degrees in Physics, his exposure to harmful materials as a graduate student, his excessive knowledge of "LASERS" and his newly administered title of Dr. Cannon, Matthew is now a Super-villain. When I spoke to Dr. Cannon regarding his evilness he just laughed menacingly, confirming what many already suspected. It is unclear if Dr. Cannon is going to use his evil knowledge and combine it with his fantastic super-villain name, to create a Heavy Rydberg Ion Cannon, and perform collisions with it. It is also unclear if LASERS are involved. Insider information claims that he will be working with a "company" (most likely a horde of other villains) at a compound in Texas, looking to destroy the world through the Oil industry. Citizens in the Houston area be on the lookout, but please do not approach, he is most likely armed with a cannon, and he is extremely and evil.
All joking aside, I'm really excited for Matt, I was able to go to his defense (thanks again Emily) He did a great job, he's so freekn' smart! If you're wondering if I understood anything... no, not really, but I was not the intended audience (did I mention it was really long). His thesis was over 200 pages (I’m planning on reading it at night to put the kids to sleep- if that doesn't work I can just hit them in the head with it, that's sure to knock them out). His lab partners as well as his advisor, were all impressed with his defense and all his data. I know he was nervous before, but it didn't show during his presentation, he was funny and even able to answer questions with ease. I'm so happy I went, it was great to see him in "action" (well as much action as physicists do).
